Fierce, Funny, and Female – Book Excerpt

FROM CHAPTER THIRTEEN OF FIERCE, FUNNY, AND FEMALE

BY MARTI MacGIBBON 

Oil Field Trash and Proud of It

Over a span of several years, the Lone Star State, and the oil patch in particular, favored me with prosperity, education— the kind you can’t access in books, and confidence—a brash, badass assurance acquired by emerging unscathed from daily encounters with violent men, venomous snakes, and tests of endurance. I will forever thank Texas—its wild, rowdy weather extremes and its resilient, eccentric native citizens—for teaching me how to adapt, survive, and discover my inner strength by thinking for myself. Oil field life taught me that it’s not whether you’re up or down on your luck that matters, but how steady is your resolve, will, and focus. Hope dies hard in the oil patch, and when I arrived in Texas, hope was damn near all I carried with me.

Surveying taught me about point of departure, closure, and every stop in between. Today, if I look at my life as a line through time and space, with birth as the point of departure, and death closing the loop, then at each point in between, I do what I learned operating a theodolite. At regular intervals along the line, I check the backsight, where I’ve come from, then home in on the foresight, where I’m headed next. On the frigid, windy day when I stepped up to the tripod, peered through the scope, and turned my first set of angles, I began to think of life that way. It’s a strong philosophy for staying focused and moving toward goals.

I’ve dodged bullets and worked with explosives. I’ve stood off rattlesnakes, water moccasins, copperheads, and even a coral snake; been bit by every kind of multi-legged crawling thing, attacked by fire ants, scorpions, and every winged harpy in the insect world. I’ve witnessed one oil rig fire at close range and several more from a distance. I’ve worked waaay out in the woods, day after day, as the sole female among males of questionable moral character and unquestionable ability to do harm. Some of these experiences taught me how not to show fear. Others showed me how to sideline hindrances and push forward to the goal. All of them schooled me in honing my sense of humor, and never taking myself too seriously for my own good.

All those earned skills and learned lessons came in handy when I stumbled into the world of standup comedy. Texas graced me with genuine friends. From the first night I met Billy and Terri in Chicago—genuine allies—I learned how to get back up after getting knocked down, and to be proactive: to make things happen, rather than passively reacting to what happens in life.