Detaching With Love and Other Insights – My Book Review

by Dina Gachman
Grief & Bereavement / Love & Loss / Parenting & Relationships
Publisher: Union Square & Co.
Page Count: 240 pages
Publication Date: April 11, 2023
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A heartfelt exploration about what it means to process grief, by a bestselling author and journalist whose experience with two devastating losses inspired her to bring comfort and understanding to others.
Since losing her mother to cancer in 2018 and her sister to alcoholism less than three years later, author and journalist Dina Gachman has dedicated herself to understanding what it means to grieve, healing after loss, and the ways we stay connected to those we miss. Through a mix of personal storytelling, reporting, and insight from experts and even moments of humor, Gachman gives readers a fresh take on grief and bereavement—whether the loss is a family member, beloved pet, or a romantic relationship. No one wants to join the grief club, since membership comes with zero perks, but So Sorry for Your Loss will make that initiation just a little less painful.
In the spirit of Elizabeth Kubler Ross books like On Grief and Grieving, or C.S. Lewis’s A Grief Observed, So Sorry for Your Loss is the perfect gift for someone who is grieving. With her blend of personal experiences, expert advice, and just a little bit of humor, Gachman has provided a compassionate and compelling resource for anyone looking for grief books.


“Gachman perceptively puts words to the uncomfortable realities of loss…and deconstructs its social myths, helping readers feel less alone. Those facing loss will find solace here.” Publishers Weekly

So Sorry for Your Loss is a monument to the work of remembering and a testament to the immutable love of family and the grief that forever changes us.” —Lauren Hough, New York Times bestselling author of Leaving Isn’t the Hardest Thing

So Sorry for Your Loss is a meditation on loss that reminds us how to go on living.” —Deirdre Fagan, author of Find a Place for Me and The Grief Eaters


Book Review Image

XTRA Bookstagram by Maida Malby This was a tough book to read. Difficult in the sense that it deals with the thorny and deeply personal subjects of grief and loss. So Sorry for Your Loss is the book of wisdom I wish I had read during the many instances of my personal loss and getting through it.

I went into a deep depression for a year after the death of my dad. I finally moved on to new things, like weight training, Goth music, and wildlife conservation. While the years have passed the loss of my dad has gotten easier but it never goes away. The most recent loss of my German shepherd, Azrael, hit me hard to where I have nearly shut down completely.  This type of grief and bereavement over the loss of pets is only understood by a few.

The personal stories and research author Dina Gachman shares are highly relatable in dealing with the death of a loved one of either a parent, sibling, or beloved pet.  No one escapes this merry-go-round of loss in their life.

The take-to-heart message of this little gem is that silence is not an option. It is indeed the worst thing you can do for anyone when they lose a person or pet. For some strange reason, you remember the ones who said something, and the ones who kept silent stick out in your mind for years to come.

Love when an author introduces me to a new term. In this case, Solastalgia related to environmental destruction. I did not realize there was a term for what I experienced when seeing more concrete poured where fields used to be. So Sorry for Your Loss includes resources at the end, as well as recipes to make and give.

Dina’s book is a valuable read for those who recently have experienced loss or lost someone long ago. If you have lost a beloved pet the J’aime Mon Chien chapter is a must for you to read.

This entire book is like a roadmap showing you can get and will get through your grief, that detaching with love is perfectly acceptable, and that animals do have more profound impacts on our lives than we realize. Most importantly, is like a guiding star for one of the darkest moments in your life. Oh, and that bucket of fried chicken is the best option to drop off when a friend has lost someone dear, including a beloved pet.

Yes, this is a tough book to read, yet at its core you need to read So Sorry for Your Loss  if you’ve experienced loss.

Dina Gachman is a Pulitzer Center Grantee and a frequent contributor to the New York Times, Vox, Texas Monthly, and more. She’s a New York Times bestselling ghostwriter and the author of Brokenomics: 50 Ways to Live the Dream on a Dime. She lives near Austin, Texas, with her husband and son. Photo credit Jessica Comiskey.
Three winners each receive a signed copy of
So Sorry for Your Loss
(US only; ends midnight, CST, 5/12/23)

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